|Posted by mamato2 on January 22, 2011 at 10:52 AM|
That is the WW song that is everywhere now. It does make me think about my favorite verse that every day is a new day though. Sometimes when I look back on this journey as a whole it feels not worth it. It has cost me so much. It has cost me a lot of money. A lot of energy. A lot of time with friends. A lot of people treating me different. A lot of missing out on old favorite foods. So much time! It feels like a high price to pay somedays for a smaller size pants that is still a lot bigger size than most people hope for. Somedays it doesn't seem like a good trade to me. Some days I miss a lot of the things that have changed.
And then it's a new day. And the habbits I have worked for 2 years on building into my life come into play. I can feel the changes in my body being stronger and being a newer me and I love it. I don't struggle to get off the couch. I don't feel so ashamed of myself. I don't hate myself for the choices I made about what I ate. I don't miss the money I would have spent on something anyway. I don't care if I am not a great size because I am a better size.
I don't care that I missed out on my favorite food when I go to bed that night. Tempting food is so hard sometimes. When I know everyone is going to be having pizza except me. It is so temporary though. Like I have never cared I didn't get something after it was over. I have no regrets of not having had a piece of cake or pizza in the past. It is just the temptation of the present. I try and tell myself to hang on cuz in 20 minutes when everyone is done eating, I won't feel ripped off anymore, just proud of a good choice.
So, I am rambling, but what I want to get down here is that some days make this feel not worth it. Then there is a new day, or God's new mercies on a new morning and I see the advantages of staying the course even on those days it doesn't feel worth it. Right now I feel like it is. I just had a healthy breakfast, I am heading to the gym. Have a crockpot of veggie soup on the counter, and my day planned out and it feels good. So when I go back to read this on a day when it feels like it stinks, I can just hang in there till it's a new day!
Oh and the pic is that I can wear my hubbies jeans now. Yes they are too tight but i got them buttoned!